Confusion

This morning as I began my daily walk it was still dark. The eastern sky had a hint of dawn but in our tree surrounded property I could not see well enough to walk my path. So I begin by walking the private drive that allows access to our log cabin. As I made the bottom of the hill and turned back toward our home the trees framed the driveway and the sky outlined the tops. It was as though our drive was lined with tall dark sentinels and invited one's eye to move up the drive, up the dark trees to the sky beginning to lighten. It was a serene, beautiful view, one I've admired before but this morning I guess it seemed special.

I wondered how many were as fortunate as I to own ten acres, a nice snug log cabin, surrounded by trees and thickets yet living a short drive from shopping. I wondered how many people were able to enjoy the serenity of their surroundings and the peace of mind it helps bestow.

Then I thought of the tens of millions of people who wake up hungry. Their living conditions are threatening, there is no long term relief in sight, just living from day to day. Here I am with a warm bed, good food and a loving companion to share the comfort we enjoy. I do not feel guilty for that which I have, but I wonder why there is so much poverty, sickness, and cruel neighbors in the world that plague such a large part of mankind.

On the one hand I think with such inherent order in the world, the "system" that certainly there is some force we cannot comprehend at work here. Yet how can such a force allow for so much inequity? Then the thought comes to mind that is precisely our job. We are supposed to make a difference. Yet here I am walking for my health on an early Sunday morning. What should I do? Oh, confusion.